What Do You Bring To The Table?

“What do you bring to the table?” men sometime ask women. A popular response seems to be “I am the table,” which doesn’t even make sense. You are a piece of furniture? I guess the ability to formulate a coherent answer is not something she brings to the table.

I think what she really means is: “my pussy.” That nice … I guess … but usually it is best to rent by the hour. Especially when the woman herself has told you that the rest of her is worthless. A woman of this sort doesn’t even try to lie convincingly. She hasn’t even thought of what a good answer might be. She is not much more than a life-support system for her snatch. A rational man knows exactly what to do with a woman like this.

So, since it seems that many women are not capable of devising a response to this question, even in the form of a plausible lie, I will give you some help:

I am debt-free.
I am not a slut (preferably, a virgin).
I value children and family.
I am under 25.
I reject feminism.
I want to be a good wife and mother.
I want to be a stay-at-home Mom.
I will stay in shape and dress nicely.
I will not Compete, Criticize, Complain or Control.
I believe that women should be cooperative (“submissive”) to their husbands.
Raising our children well is a major life goal for me.
I want to homeschool our children.
I will keep a beautiful house.
I am frugal.
I will work every day for the family’s benefit.
I will support you in your career.
I will cook tasty, healthy meals from natural ingredients.
Education is important to me; beginning with my own education.
I think single cat ladies over 30 are losers.
I love sex.
I think it is important for a wife to have sex with her husband regularly, even if she is “not in the mood.”
Women who divorce for no good reason are a plague on society and their husbands and children.
I want to avoid divorce for all but the most extreme circumstances.

I could go on, but I already did in the Good Wife series. You get the idea. Obviously, a woman can say a whole lot of stuff, and what actually happens after you marry her is another thing. Also, there are some women who are pretty much brainless, and couldn’t formulate a list like this if you asked them to, but nevertheless actually have good behavior and make good wives, because they were raised well. Still, if a woman can’t even manage to blurt out some hypothetical virtues, a man is probably better off leaving her be. Let her be the table! Har!

Published by proprietor

Happily married, with children.

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