Grow Up

Although I usually give guidance to (largely hypothetical) young women and girls here, sometimes our young men and boys need some help too.

In general, it takes longer for a man to mature than a woman. This is because, among other factors, men are more complicated than women. Women are largely imitators, and it is not too hard to imitate. Men are creators, which can involve a lot of trial, error and experimentation.

But, even so, men today take too long to grow up. Time to grow up!

For young men, or perhaps boys around Age 15, I would say: skip “youth culture.” You are eventually going to drop all that stupid “youth culture” crap anyway, so why not just drop it now? I mean: the clothes, the manner of speaking, the poor grooming habits, the music, and all the other things of that sort. Before 1960, people went directly from childhood to adulthood. The “culture” of a 19-year old college student was the same as his 50-year old professor. Boys became men without getting bogged down in “youth culture” for 15 years.

These young men are not playing dress-up for the camera. This was jus a regular day in Princeton in the 1950s.

Young college men during their free time.

A dance.

Serious young men. They also knew how to party.

Look to somewhat older and serious men that you admire, and imitate them. This might be men around Age 28-45. In the past, boys were naturally inclined to begin the transition to manhood around Age 13. This often involved beginning grown-up tasks like an apprenticeship in some useful trade or occupation. It often involved being in the company of other grown men.

Here is a painting of “Midshipman August Brine.” The year is 1782. The boy is thirteen years old. His father is Admiral James Brine. August Brine enlisted that year on a warship, the “Belliqueux,” under the command of his father.

The boy is on a warship at Age 13. Can’t you just tell he is going to be a badass? He became a Rear Admiral in 1822.

No childish things here. Look at his dress. Look at his manner. He is trying to be a man. Most American men don’t achieve this level of maturity even at Age 25.

No dopey dumbass “youth culture” for these young men.