“Indian Bronson” on Twitter has been offering a steady flow of excellent insight. Apparently, this is part of his marketing strategy for a marriage-and-family-oriented dating/matchmaking service — keeper.ai
Among other things, Indian Bronson supports sort-of-arranged marriages.
Miles Mathis, who is also interesting for many things, recently took up the topic of relations between men and women, including a lot of details about his own marriages.
Mathis doesn’t really go for the “no sex before marriage” line as we do here. Mostly, he is all for it, as part of the path to marriage, in what you might call a 1980s sort of way. Basically, it is the typical “things should be like they were when I was young.” Nevertheless, much worthwhile commentary in the piece.
I attempt to control my wife’s social environment so that the women in her environment are good influences – that the social environment is such that a woman may not be permanently on the prowl for an upgrade.
Patriarchs take their families to church for the social environment – for the backing of God and man to maintain good behavior in wife and children, and also to obtain virgin wives for sons, and suitable husbands for daughters.
Actually, I think a lot of young women manage to get through college without becoming sluts. Some — at Harvard it is apparently about 25% — even graduate as virgins. But is this really an accomplishment? It would be better if they stayed at home, and were married by Age 21.
This is a good description of what is happening today. It can never work.
“Synthesizing a moral code out of whole cloth” is not a bad thing to do. It is, more or less, what we are doing here at this website. Admittedly, I am basically taking old forms verbatim. But, that is because, on inspecting them, I can find little that needs to be changed, and also, no convincing alternatives. We could debate whether these old forms are viable or sustainable in an age of contraception and social media. But, still there are no convincing alternatives.
This is best done by older people — basically, parents — over Age 40. They have the experience, the memories of past “moral codes,” the insight, and also the time to do this. I myself have spent — let’s say — the past eight or ten years, doing this. Young people don’t have the time. It might take them eight or ten years. But, then they are 28 or 30, and discover that they did everything wrong. They also discover that it is very hard to come back from doing everything wrong for ten years.
Here’s pornstar and single mom Lana Rhoades, apparently having some second thoughts.
Meanwhile, for those girls who do actually wait, things aren’t going so well for them either.
Helen Roy, our example TradBabe subcategory BigBrain, and also new mother, said recently that she was able to avoid all this because she “got lucky” and was “young and retarded.”
So, it will basically come down to parents. This pattern of parents abandoning their children to “figure it out for themselves” won’t work, and can never work. Parents will not only have to express certain principles, but also do most of the work, as parents did in the past. Parents will have to establish contexts where their sons and daughters can make connections with the sorts of young men and women that they would like to have as sons-and-daughters-in-law.
When girls reached age 16, they were “debuted into society.” Basically, they were officially available for marriage. This was celebrated in a “debutante ball.”
Do you think that sixteen year old girls organized and paid for this? They did not. It was all done by parents. But, there was more to it than just a party. Girls and boys both had to be trained how to dance, and wear nice clothes. They often attended dance classes for years, boys and girls both. And who did that, and paid for all that? Parents did.
When a woman is merely a woman-when she winds herself round and round men’s hearts with her smiles and sobs and services and caressing endearments-then she is happy. Of what use to her are learning and great achievements?
A description of marriage and family life in India, from the ancient era to the early 20th century. From the Story of Civilization (vol 1), by Will Durant.
There’s a lot of wheezing these days that men are underrepresented in universities. Time to man up! But, actually, the percentage of men completing bachelor’s degrees is the highest ever.
Probably, this is way too high. Many of these men would probably be better off with more of a vocational training. The lower 50% of college education today is mostly a scam.
The fraction of women vs. men getting bachelor’s degrees has actually been pretty stable for two decades.
We see that the rate of men graduating from college with a bachelor’s degree had been about flat since the early 1970s, around 23%. There was a burst higher in the late 1960s and early 1970s, possibly related to draft exclusions from the Vietnam War. Then, male graduation rates ramp higher beginning around 2010. This is related to the student loan scam that also began around the same time. (Actually there is some lag, since this measures 25-29yos.) Rather than “not enough men in college,” it looks to me like there are too many.
The recent levels — around 35% of men getting a bachelor’s degree — are about 50% higher than the previous long-term standard, around 23%.
Men should bail out from today’s colleges. For one thing, they have become viciously anti-male institutions in recent years. Why give them your money? Many men would be better off getting more vocational training. Some men could just start their own businesses. A few men could take four years off and read a lot of books, and then get a job.
For those remaining men, who are well suited for the traditional four-year college education, these men would be best off, I think, in new male-only colleges. There will be a lot of college campuses for sale, which someone can buy and set up a new male-only college.
Going forward, post-high-school education is likely to be more overtly vocational. Most of the worthwhile college programs are basically vocational. This includes all math, science and engineering; plus common programs such as nursing, accounting, hotel management, marketing and business. These could be done at more overtly polytechnic universities, leaving aside any pretend “liberal arts” element which we all know is pure horseshit today. Probably, this could be done in two years, instead of four. Let people learn the Liberal Arts on their own, outside of an institution of Marxist indoctrination. This is what working Americans used to do.
For men, there can be a much smaller element (let’s say it is under 5%) that pursue an actual Liberal Arts education, in government, history, economics, arts and literature. This will have to be done basically at new institutions, since, with a few exceptions like Hillsdale College, all institutions today are corrupt.
Today, as we marvel at whatever Madonna has become, we will give a thumbs up to 1980s rock babe Susanna Hoffs, who is now 64.
She has been married to the same guy for nearly 30 years, and has two children.
Unlike Paulina Porizkova, who is apparently playing on Expert Mode without plastic surgery, makeup, filters or even colored hair, Hoffs is suspected of having a (talented) plastic surgeon.
For women who have a 20 to 45-year advantage to Susanna Hoffs but still don’t look this good: You might want to do something about that.
Today, we have our periodic exhortation for men to become politically active. This means: Take some kind of action that can lead to changes in the legal framework surrounding marriage and other male/female interactions (“sexual harrassment,” “sexual assault,” “domestic violence,” etc.) No woman is going to do this, so complaining to women won’t work. This is mostly State and even Local (Municipal) law, and also law enforcement (that is, how the law is administered).
Get up off your ass and donate some small amount — I suggest $25 — to some group that is acting in your interests. I’ve suggested the National Coalition For Men (ncfm.org). Go there and donate some money. Don’t just “think about donating.” You have to take action.
If you want to take a step further, then establish a similar organization, for your State and Municipality. You can do this in your free time. It would be, for example, the “Ohio Association for Men’s Rights.” You just call yourself that. You can set up a little organization, through an LLC. This would probably include:
Defining the problem. Statistics and anecdotes, probably made available on a website.
Defining a solution. You might want to talk to lawyers who are involved in these matters, such as divorce lawyers.
Informing legislators. State congressmen, city council members. Write them a letter, and maybe meet them in person. It is easy to meet with State congresspeople. Plus, they are probably nearby.
Informing “law enforcement administrators.” Police chiefs, sheriffs, public prosecutors, judges.
To take one example, child support apparently did not exist before 1975. Its imposition since then (with a lot of Conservative support) has led to the “child support model of marriage,” where a father and husband is disposable except for a monthly check.
Then, of course, you can ask other men to pay you to support these activities. And, these other men should do so, at least in small amounts, if they have any sense of self-preservation. We have a whole legislative system (democratic republicanism) set up exactly for this purpose — to be sensitive to the needs of the people. Make use of it!
An interesting comparison was made between prenuptial agreements — or maybe we should just call them Nuptial Agreements — and Wills. If a person dies without a Will, then there is a standard government procedure to dispose of their assets. This is not good at all, which is why anyone with anything should have a Will.
Even if you do not have anything — children or assets — at the time of marriage, certainly you can expect to have something eventually. Thus, like a Will, you should agree on an arrangement for their disposal, in the event of a divorce.
Similarly, you should make every effort to keep the State out of your marriage, such as: don’t sign any Marriage Licenses, or Birth Certificates. In the past, marriages were recorded in the blank pages in the back of a Bible.
In time, marriages without prenups might be like people without wills — basically, poor people with nothing to lose. The regular middle-class process should include a Nuptial Agreement.
Mozart’s Opera Cosi Fan Tutti (“All Women Are Like That”) ends with a wedding. This wedding is consummated by … signing a Nuptial Agreement. (2:56:39) Note that this is done by a private-sector notary, who writes a custom agreement.