To keep costs down, I have suggested living in a small condo, perhaps one bedroom and about 600sf — even if you might have a family of five. But, it should be a nice place, in a decent neighborhood. Here is a real-life example of a condo in Miami, which I take as a place which is not very cheap (Detroit) and not very expensive (San Francisco). It is listed right now for $69,900.
This looks like a nice place for children, and also, you don’t have to take care of it.
The living room.
The bedroom.
Yes, it would be nice to have a big $700,000 detached house. But, it would also be nice not to have to pay for that. Take the financial load off.
Here today I will speak to young men, who might like to have a wife and family at a relatively young age.
A stay-at-home wife and family is not, inherently, all that expensive. Basically, you just have to feed them. It can get expensive in time — you might buy a big house, two cars, and all that. But, at least in the early stages, the first five years or so, you do not have to do much with a wife and infants except feed them. Basically, this is about $1000 a month. But, against this, you are not spending money on “dating” or otherwise entertaining women. Also, a wife can cook, which might mean a lot less spent on restaurant and takeout food. Even if you have a wife and three small children, you can get by for a while in the same one-bedroom apartment you had as a single guy. I know one woman who raised four children to adulthood in a 400 square foot cabin. You can get by with the same automobile that you had as a single guy. Your wife can go to the grocery store on the weekend when you aren’t using the car for work. Or maybe you could even go carfree and use a cargo bike.
Much of the expense of having a wife and family, especially a little later, has to do with “getting into the right neighborhoods.” Mostly, this is about public schools, although it is also about the neighbors and the neighbors’ children with whom your wife and children will interact. If you have a stay-at-home Wife anyway, then much of this problem can be resolved with homeschooling. You still want to live in a decent neighborhood, with decent neighbors from whom you can choose your friends and acquaintances. In general, I would make an effort to get into a decent, family-friendly neighborhood, and compromise on living space if you have to.
The “Don’t Need a Man” women are plentiful these days. When they strain their little pea brains, they might admit that it would be nice to have a man to shovel snow and fix the toilet.
So, for those women who are Taking A Stand with the Family, let me explain.
A woman doesn’t need a man, except to raise children. This is, for most women, their primary accomplishment in their lives. If you are going to raise children, then get married first, and stay married.
Your other options, as a single mom, are:
Hire a team of childcare professionals. These are the nannies, daycare, private tutors, private schools and so forth, to raise your children as they should be raised. Only a small percentage of women make enough money to pay for a team of professionals to raise their child properly.
Abandon your child to the government. The government will raise your children in their government schools, to be brainwashed little goons in their New World Order. In their remaining time, your child will be raised by the television, popular music, and the media. The results won’t be pretty.
A woman today who is Taking a Stand with the Family will probably be a homeschooler, or at least be very picky about finding private schools that reflect her values. In other words, she will be a stay-at-home Mom.
If you aren’t going to make an effort to raise your children well, these days, then it is probably best not have children at all. Just be a “free spirit” = barren whore. Women are usually not too happy with the outcome of this path, later in life, but it is not too bad for the rest of society. There are a lot of men who like barren whores, the more barren and the more whorish the better. But, you don’t marry them.
Among the non-viable, or problematic outcomes, we have:
Barren wives. If you aren’t going to have children, why get married? We can allow for women who wanted to have children, but it didn’t work out. But, you could just be “strong and independent.”
Single moms = whores who got pregnant. You will basically end up married to the corporation, or to the government anyway.
Especially these days, it’s coming down to two viable options for our young woman: Take A Stand With the Family, or be a Barren Whore. I recommend the first one. Get started early. You can just find a guy to pay for all your stuff. It’s OK! You can skip straight to the finish line, and get married around Age 18. A lot of women think they are going to somehow follow the Feminist Life Track, aiming to get married perhaps around Age 30, and somehow not accumulate damage along the way, usually (but not always) rendering women unfit for marriage. Can’t turn a Hoe into a Housewife. If you think you are going to Take a Stand with the Family at Age 30, why not skip the Feminist Merit Badge and get started earlier?
If a young woman is going to “take a stand with the family,” this doesn’t just mean getting married. Any idiot can get married. The most horrid slut can stand still in a dress for twenty minutes at a wedding ceremony. Mostly, it means what happens after you get married.
Today, I think that probably 90% of divorces are initiated, or caused, by women. For college-educated women, it might be 95%. “Initiated” doesn’t just mean filing the divorce papers. It means that the woman’s bad behavior led to the divorce. This might mean the “I’m not haaaaaappy” crap, or it might mean being such a horrid nagging bitch that a man felt the need to bail out just to keep his sanity. It might mean trying to manipulate a man by withholding sex, until, with regret, he naturally starts looking for it somewhere else. Among those marriages that do not end in divorce, but make men miserable to the point that they tell younger men to never get married, mostly this is caused by women.
In other words, today, the future of a marriage and family is largely up to a woman’s own behavior. So, a woman who “takes a stand with the family” needs to do whatever is necessary to make it work. Probably, if she does this, her husband is not going to cause any problems. Today, the divorce laws and family courts present a horrible conundrum for men, and incentivize bad behavior by women. But, this is only a problem if a couple divorces. My own parents live with the same divorce laws as everyone else, and it is irrelevant, for them.
There are a lot of aspects of being a Good Wife and a Good Mother. However, one of the most basic, and obvious ones is: a woman must not cheat on her husband. To make this a little easier, a wife should not have social media, and she should choose her friends carefully. No “girls’ night out.” A woman should be well aware that most women these days, including other mens’ wives, are degenerate wretches that no man should have married, and that no woman should associate with, if she takes a stand with the family. A woman who Takes a Stand With the Family should only associate with other women who do the same. This is not a very large group — especially for women who marry young. There are not a lot of 22 year old mothers who take a stand with the family. You might have to make friends with women much older.
Who decides whether a woman is a Good Wife? Her husband, of course. He might be a bad husband, but I don’t think it is possible for a woman to be a Good Wife, and her husband is not aware of it. If you have to say “I am a good wife but my husband doesn’t think so,” then you aren’t.
Most people do things “on autopilot.” Basically, they do what everyone around them is doing. For a long time, this worked, sort of. People got married, somehow. But, it deteriorated over time, and today, it doesn’t look like it works at all. SigmaFrame had a nice look into the “dating market” today. Basically, there is no “dating,” whatever that means. “Dating” used to mean: a monogamous “relationship,” and the process of getting to that point. Today, if you even go on a “date” at all, it mostly social foreplay for a hookup.
Today, most young women are going to do what all the other young women are doing. In other words, they will follow the herd. The herd isn’t going anywhere you want to go. Women complain about this, but they still follow the herd. They are wishing and hoping that the herd will go in a different direction. That might happen eventually, but by then it will be too late for these women.
So, the most fundamental decision is: a) follow the herd; b) don’t follow the herd. It doesn’t matter what great insights or character you have, if you follow the herd, you are going to get the same results as everyone else. There are a lot of women who have a lot of insightful commentary, as they look out the window while following the herd.
If you don’t follow the herd, then obviously you are going to have to make some decisions. You are going to have to follow something — principles, a plan — instead of the herd. You can’t just wander aimlessly. “I’m not following the herd” is not, in itself, going to be effective. It is necessary but not sufficient.
I believe in Destiny. That is, often people have a plan for their life that is established before birth, and they have to follow that plan. If the plan is to become a nuclear physicist, then a woman should become a nuclear physicist, if she feels that internal need to do so. This is different than external pressure. Typically, these “plans” are contrary to external norms, and seem rather irrational. Being a Good Wife and Mother might be your destiny.
But, nevertheless, while making space for individual Destiny, most women should focus on family and children. Just do that, and do it well, and forget about the rest. This is where you want to take a stand. Forget about career, or traveling through Europe. Who cares. You might do this after you are married. You and your young husband can travel, and you can work as a childless married couple. But, it might be best to just have children quickly, and then you will be plenty busy and not at all interested in travel or career.
If you have a full passel of children by Age 25, which is not too hard if you get married by Age 19, then you will be done with child raising by Age 45. Then you have plenty of time for a career, if you want to go that route. Or, as “empty nesters” often do, you can travel.
Phyllis Schlafly had six children, and then, afterwards, had a career as lawyer, author of 20+ books, and public activist.
Ideally, a woman, or girl, would do this early on, around Age 13. She would prepare for this process, so that when she was Age 16, she would begin the active search for a man to marry, leading to marriage around Age 18-20. If things didn’t go so smoothly, she would still have a few buffer years, Age 21-25, to get things done. After Age 25 — a full decade into the husband-hunting process — you would have to ask why she is still single.
Unfortunately, since most girls aren’t starting this process at Age 13, they will have to play catchup.
A woman would live at her father’s house until marriage. Of course she was a Debt-Free Virgin Without Tattoos. I would recommend not only no sex before marriage, but also no kissing above the wrist. This should serve as good motivation to get married quickly. I would not recommend college, but a woman can certainly be ambitious about educating herself, at home. In practice, almost any kind of self-education today is better than almost any college, and also it’s free.
A woman, even one who is perhaps 25yo and now playing catchup, should prepare to serve the role as a Good Wife and Good Mother. This is a role, and you have to play the role well. If you don’t want to play that role, then don’t get married and don’t have children. You can go play the role of the Good Employee or Good Aunt or Good Girlfriend until the end of your days. That is fine.
When I say a “role,” I mean simply that you must function well in that position. Most women today become irate that anyone should have any expectations of them. A woman can do what she wants, but nobody should engage her as a Wife and Mother, if she is incapable and unwilling to function in that role. For example, I do not insist that any man today learn auto repair. A man can do what he likes. But, if I want someone to fix my car, he had better be good at auto repair. He has the skills and preparation and willingness to serve a certain role. He fixes my car, and I pay him. We are both better off.
Today, the preparation for a Good Wife and a Good Mother is complicated by the fact that there aren’t many good examples to follow. A woman should study these roles diligently. You might have not much more than dusty old books to go by, the record and remains of prior successful civilizations. Even today, there are better sorts of wives, particularly among the upper middle class, but very few that are not substantially compromised by feminism and the other problems of our age.
The dustiest and oldest book is the Bible, which has quite a lot of good guidance in it. I would look at this even if you are not a practicing Christian. It helps to have a guide to the Bible. I recommend Lori Alexander at The Transformed Wife (thetransformedwife.com). The basic principles of being a Good Wife and a Good Mother seem to be universal. They are much the same in India and China as in the West. But, just as a book written in Chinese doesn’t help us much, the Christian tradition is our “moral language.”
I have come to appreciate that it is important for a woman to read old novels, of a high moral character. These are books for children, and also adults. Only in novels do we have a portrayal of real life, an example to follow, not vague abstract principles. Some good books include:
All of Jane Austen’s books The books of Charles Dickens, notably David Copperfield Children’s books including The Little House on the Prairie series, Little Women series, Anne of Green Gables series, and the books of Francis Hodgson Burnett (The Secret Garden, The Little Princess, Little Lord Fauntleroy). I would read these children’s books even as an adult.
To have the proper effect, I would eliminate all major media, including all movies and television, magazines and newspapers, and most popular music. All of this is corrupt. You need to flush out the filth in your mind and replace it with something more wholesome.
I would seek out communities of like-minded young women — especially young married TradBabes with children. Twitter has a strong TradBabe community. Start with @helen_of_roy, @amorettelocke/@trophywifentlsm and @RRR0BYN. It would be hard to find anything similar “in real life,” even among church groups, but it is worth trying. I think it is good if your role models are Babes, because Babes have options. The fact that they have intentionally chosen to be Good Wives and Mothers, and are actually doing that with a real-life husband and real-life children before the age of 30, or ideally before the age of 25, is important. You don’t want to get the impression that marriage is for ugly girls that “had to settle.” You don’t want to get the impression that you should spend your twenties posting TradBabe memes on Twitter, while remaining single. You don’t want to get the impression that you should spend your twenties “saving yourself for marriage” sometime around Age 28-30, instead of Making Babies with the man you specially chose to do that all the time with. You do not want to become a “season of singleness coach” in your twenties, or a celibate Instagram model, or spend years with a celibate boyfriend. Get married and make babies. In the past, women “saved themselves for marriage” for two whole years, between Age 16 and 18. It wasn’t that difficult.
Mrs. Midwest is a total babe, and a married mother of two. Just like it should be. Lucky husband!
That is enough for now, but I will continue with this theme.
I have said that you really only need to do a few things to Be a Babe: Eat good food; get some exercise; and pay a little attention to dress and beautification. You can add to this list of course. Five years of ballet training helps, which is why upper-class mothers insisted on it. But, you have to start somewhere.
You can just Eat Good Food, and Get Some Exercise, and eventually you will probably arrive at Babedom. But, maybe you would like to get serious about it. You want to be Maximally Babealicious in Minimum Time.
In that case, I have a plan for you:
Six months of:
Raw Vegan diet. Mostly, this is fresh fruits.
Daily exercise.
an Herbal Cleasing course.
No makeup.
After all this, you can get a Beauty Makeover, focused on things like clothing and hairstyle. You might want to enlist a friend who is good at that sort of thing, or even hire a professional. Just let them play Barbie with your body. For one thing, you old clothes probably won’t fit anymore, so you will have to buy something new anyway. I would plan on No Makeup, since if you can Be a Babe with No Makeup, it is certainly not hard to be one with a little makeup. I think a lot of women these days just plain don’t know how to dress themselves properly, and need some help. You might be one of them.
There is some debate as to whether a Raw Vegan diet is a good course for the long term. But, since we are talking about only six months here, the long-term effects are not particularly relevant. Just do the six months, and then you can decide afterwards what you would like to do from then on.
Food is more important than exercise. It is best to have both, but you can get by with rather light exercise if you stay focused on keeping a Raw Vegan diet.
Some people want to debate things like diet forever. This is mostly because they would rather blahblah than actually eat fruit for six months, which does require some focus and attention. Nobody ever went from Fugly to Babe by debating. You can only get there with diet and exercise. So, stop debating and start eating your bananas and peaches.
After you have done the six-month program, as described, then you can talk about it. Probably, you will conclude that: “This is so easy, and so effective, that I pity all those who waste their time debating rather than producing results.”
Raw Vegan diet. You can learn about this elsewhere. Mostly, it means fresh fruit and vegetables, with vegetables mostly in the form of salads since they are raw. You can eat as much as you want, without calorie restriction. “Raw” means uncooked. “Vegan” means no animal products, including dairy or eggs or raw meats or fish. If it is not Raw or not Vegan, don’t put it in your mouth.
Daily exercise. This can be many things, from a beach volleyball league, to yoga, to ballroom dance, to tennis, to triathlon training, to mountain biking or snowboarding, to some combination of all of these. But, it means Every Day, which, in practice, is six days with an off day or recovery day. If you don’t know what you want to do, go to beachbodyondemand.com for some exercise videos.
Go to drnatura.com and do three months of their three-part Colonix program.
That’s it! You can say a lot about each of these things, but the important thing is to get started, and to keep with it for six months.
I admit, that six months on a program like this can seem daunting. It is actually not that hard, but it might seem hard, so that people never actually begin.
So, just start with one month. After one month, you can decide if you want to continue to a second month, with an eye to doing all six months if you can.
In practice, the first month is the hardest, and already by Week 4, you will notice that it gets considerably easier. After a month, you will say: “Well, I got through one month, so maybe I can do one more.” The second month will be a lot easier. After the second month, you will say: “That wasn’t so hard, so let’s go to three months.” After three months, you will be so accustomed to this way of life that the second three months will coast by on autopilot. So, just get the first month done.
One woman who knows all about Babedom, and also all about Eating Raw (although, in her case, not vegan), and exercising, is former supermodel Carol Alt. In her book Eating in the Raw, she says that, after a decade at the top of her game, she started eating a Raw Food diet. She found that she got better results, with less work, and no calorie restriction.
Carol Alt in 1980.
Carol Alt recently, Age 61. Minimal makeup.
If you do this, including the Beauty Makeover, you will probably end up in the Top 20% for your age group, no matter what sort of body type you have. That might be a lot of fun.
Maybe, along the way, you will “make some friends in the raw vegan community.” That might be fun.
Here again is Ava Gardner, in her own voice, singing about loving an ordinary guy named Bill. From Show Boat (1951).
I used to dream that I would discover The perfect lover someday I knew I’d recognize him if ever He came ’round my way
I always used to fancy then He’d be one of the god-like kind of men With a giant brain and a noble head Like the heroes bold in the books I’ve read
But along came Bill Who’s not the type at all You’d meet him on the street And never notice him
His form and face His manly grace Are not the kind that you Would find in a statue
And I can’t explain It’s surely not his brain That makes me thrill I love him because he’s wonderful Because he’s just my Bill
He can’t play golf or tennis or polo Or sing a solo or row He isn’t half as handsome As dozens of men that I know
He isn’t tall or straight or slim And he dresses far worse than Ted or Jim And I can’t explain why he should be Just the one, one man in the world for me
He’s just my Bill an ordinary man He hasn’t got a thing that I can brag about And yet to be upon his knee So comfy and roomy seems natural to me
Oh, I can’t explain It’s surely not his brain That makes me thrill I love him because he’s, I don’t know Because he’s just my Bill
Although we might prefer Ava Gardner’s own voice on these tracks, audiences at the time apparently preferred Annette Warren’s voice.
Here’s Annette Warren’s voice, in the released movie.
From Hugh Fordin’s book “The World Of Entertainment!”:
Ava had made up her mind to sing her two numbers herself: no dubbing. Both songs, Can’t Help Lovin’ That Man” and “Bill,” not only require a voice but vocal skill of a high degree. Coaching her, Fdens knew from the very start that his efforts were in vain. Accompanying her at the piano, he recorded a test which turned out to be pale, thin and tentative. He decided to audition voice doubles: Marni Nixon, Anita Ellis, Carole Richards and Annette Warren. He found Warren’s singing voice best suited as a match for Gardner’s speaking voice.
When it came to the prerecordings Gardner still insisted on singing the songs herself. As a precaution a set of tracks was also made by Warren.
After a couple of weeks of screening the two scenes for a number of in- and outsiders, Annette Warren was called back to rerecord the songs, now to Gardner’s lip-synch. What ensued until after the production had closed was a kind of a parlor game. Warren’s tracks were in; Warren’s tracks were out. Gardner’s tracks were in, and then they were out; and so on and so forth, depending on the comment of whoever had seen the sequences last.
Before starting the dubbing of the picture, vocal director Lela Simone asked music director Roger Edens “And who is singing?” The answer was a not very enthusiasic: “Ava.”
The picture was previewed on March 22, 1951. The one change that was made afterward was that Gardner’s voice was out and Warren’s voice was in. At the second preview on April 3, the change had a very noticeable and positive effect on the audience.
When Simone asked and Jesse Kaye discussed the forthcoming soundtrack album he felt that for reasons of exploitation and sale Ava Gardner’s name on the cover would be an added plus. Simone took great pains in the dubbing of Gardner’s tracks, backing up her voice with the accompmaniments to make her sound more palatable.
Here’s legendary superbabe Ava Gardner (even today people call her the Most Beautiful Woman in the History of Hollywood) singing about loving one man for the rest of her days, from Show Boat (1951).
Ava Gardner was an actress, not a singer, which is why she was dubbed by Annette Warren. But, here is Gardner’s own singing, which is pretty good. Maybe, to our ears today, better.
From “Ava: My Story”
“Now, I can sing. I do not expect to be taken for Maria Callas, Ella Fitzgerald, or Lena Home, but I can carry a tune well enough for the likes of Artie Shaw to feel safe offering to put me in front of his orchestra. But since Julie’s two songs, “Bill” and “Can’t Help Loving That Man,” are so beloved by everyone, I decided to work as hard as I could to fit the bill. I even found this marvelous teacher, who’d worked with both Lena and Dorothy Dandridge, and we slaved away for several weeks and produced a test record of those two songs.
Then, rather nervously, I took my life into my hands and gave the record to Arthur Freed himself, God Almighty of musical productions. I don’t think the son of a bitch ever even listened to it He just put it on a shelf and delivered the usual studio ultimatum: “Now, listen, Ava, you can’t sing and you’re among professional singers.” So that settled that one.
Or did it? Because the singer they’d chosen to dub my singing had a high, rather tiny voice, totally inappropriate when it was paired with my own speaking voice. The studio spent thousands and thousands of dollars and used the full MGM orchestra trying to get this poor girl right. I mean, there was nothing wrong with her in the first place, except for the obvious fact that she wasn’t me.
Finally, they got Annette Warren, this gal who used to do a lot of my singing off-screen, and they substituted her voice for mine. So my Southern twang suddenly stops talking and her soprano starts singing – hell, what a mess.
When it came to the album version of the movie, things got even worse. Being a great fan of Lena’s, I had copied her phrasing, note for note, on my test record. So they took my record imitating Lena and put earphones on her so she could sing the songs copying me copying her.
But Metro soon found out that they couldn’t legally release the album with my name and image, as they called it, without my voice being part of the package. So then I used earphones to try to record my voice over her voice, which had been recorded over my voice imitating her. I did it note for note, they wiped Lena’s voice off the album, and the record was a success. That’s the way they worked in those days. And I still get goddamn royalties on the thing!”
Here we are in 2022, and apparently, for a married mother of three to actually get out of bed, and actually feed her family, is news.
This is apparently a disturbing development for feminist types, who also get up at 6am, and also make breakfast and clean, before heading off to work all day.
This “making breakfast” can get pretty Oppressive.
“Sometimes it’s scrambled eggs, some-times it’s an omelette for Phil,” she says. “I like to feed him properly and make sure he’s full until at least lunchtime. He can’t be powered just by toast.
“The older two children are fussy eaters so it’s never just something easy like cereal.
“It can mean sorting out a variety of different meals, like brioche and Marmite toast, pancakes and smoothies, to make sure they are all happy — but I’m willing to do it. It’s my job as a mum.”
There must be some Patriarchy or Toxic Masculinity in here somewhere.
But, the interesting part is farther down the article.
Despite going to an expensive private school in Ipswich — and getting 12 GCSEs including one A*, four As, five Bs and 2Cs — Bronte did not want a high-earning career.
Her decision to become a teen mother stunned many of her school friends, who now hold down big careers as lawyers and doctors.
“It broke my heart putting them into storage when I was about 12 but I felt, being in secondary school, I was too old to play with them.”
But becoming a mum was not all plain-sailing, because Bronte’s parents were disappointed with her.
She says: “I can’t lie, relations with my parents were tense for some time afterwards. They wanted me to go to university.
“But now we are in a good place and they dote on the children.” …
She says: “My parents paid a lot of money for me to go to private school with the assumption I’d go to uni.
“Being a mum was all I could think about. Something was missing until I had her.”
Bronte, who quit studying A levels in maths, biology, chemistry and IT after a few months, argues that people who belittle young mums are foolish because bringing up children is incredibly hard work.
She says: “Years ago if you hadn’t had a baby when you were 20, you were considered to be a spinster, but now it is the reverse. It takes a very intelligent person to bring up children. I wouldn’t consider a career that took me away from my family.
“There’s so many people relying on nannies but I want to be there for my children.
“I have really high standards. I would not be able to split myself in so many ways and also be there for the children.
“People say I am wasting myself, especially because I went to private school.
“But I simply take a relaxed approach to education. I don’t think university is the most important thing.”
She should have got married first before moving in with her future husband, and maybe finishing her high school education, but nevertheless, this sort of thing apparently is now one step from running off to join the circus.
I caution that women who want to wait until marriage (they are virgins), and who want to be stay-at-home mothers, should abandon the whole Feminist life track. Get married around Age 18, and start making some babies. She has three children at Age 29. Probably, you are going to have to find a man over 25, who can support a family, and who also wants to; and who is not too ugly, or mean. Which is already not such an easy thing. And you only have one year before you are 19.
Cornerstone 